Can You Know The Mind Of God?

No. Here’s why:

Research shows that human beings are incapable of discerning intelligence beyond a certain micro- or meta-threshold. For us to perceive intelligence, it has to fit within our behavioural framework. If we were to encounter intelligence operating outside that framework – on a micro-level, for instance – we would fail to see it. Similarly, if we were to come into contact with a far higher intelligence, a mind vastly superior to our own, we would see only chaos, as its reasoning would elude us. Decisions taken by a higher instance of intelligence would prove inscrutable to our intellect, having been made within parameters beyodn the reach of human understanding. Imagine a dog’s view of us. To the dog, a person appears not as a mind, but as a force to be obeyed. From its perspective, human behaviour is arbitrary: our actions are based on considerations that canine perception fails to grasp. It follows therefore that, should God exist, we would be incapable of recognizing him or her as an intelligent being since divine thought would encompass a totality of factors too complex for us to comprehend. Consequently, God would appear as a force of chaos, and therefore scarcely the entity that we would like to see governing the outcome of a football match, let alone a war. A being of that kind would exist beyond the limits of human perception. And that in turn prompts the question as to whether the meta-being God would be capable of perceiving intelligence on the sub-level of the human. Maybe we are an experiment in a petrie dish after all…
~ Frank Schatzing The Swarm

I quite like that explanation. It seems to along with a Taoist saying of which I’m fond:

“If you think you can speak about the Tao,
it is clear you don’t know what you’re talking about”

I always think this is the Taoist equivalent of the Buddhist saying:

“If you meet the Buddha, kill him”

I think both are trying to say that you cannot know the mind of God (in whatever form you choose).  I would suggest then that anyone who claims to know God’s will is either terribly deluded or dangerously manipulative.

My Rebuttal to CityCaucus.com

So I stumbled upon this tonight:

Robertson’s links to powerful foreign funders demands full transparency

In the article the author uses a great little rhetorical trick to get us started.  See if you can catch it.

Vancouver’s Mayor Gregor Robertson says that he wants our city to re-think the transit of oil tankers through our waters. In light of the horrific oil spill in the Gulf, surely every port city should be re-check plans and preparations for mitigating inevitable risks. No matter how well-prepared we are, accidents still happen. So if Mayor Gregor Robertson has Canada’s interests at heart, that’s great. On the other hand, if the Mayor’s recent move is partially to please the U.S. funders of his entourage, Vancouver voters have the right to know.

So she never actually says Robertson is not acting with Canada’s interests at heart, which is what she has set up rhetorically as the positive choice, but she is demanding that if he is doing this to please U.S. funders of his entourage (which is set up as the opposite choice), that he let Vancouver voters know (because she has asserted they have a right to know).  That’s awesome.  Great command of a rhetorical device.

But, what the hell, I’ll take the bait.  Let’s examine her premise.

Premise:  Mayor Gregor Robertson is examining oil related transit because of influence of US based, oil-backed interests.

Evidence:  1 contributor to Robertson sits on board of Tides Canada and Tides US.  They are big foundations.  They give a lot of money to a lot of people.  Some of that money comes from Pew and Hewlett.  Pew money comes from oil.  I’m not sure what the objection is regarding Hewlett, but for the sake of consistency let me add, Hewlett money comes from computers.

So in the immortal words of Deep Throat, “Follow the money.”: 

Oil – Pew – Tides US – Tides Canada – Renewal Partners – Strategic Comm. – Robertson.

 

Six Degrees of Separation?  Let’s put aside that social theory, a really fun Bacon-related game, and a pretty great Will Smith film all suggest that anyone can be connected to anyone via six degrees of separation, let’s see if we can connect Robertson to “Big Oil”.

In doing my research I used only the resources and links provided by the author in the story.

In 09 Tides Canda gave no grants to contributors to Robertson listed in this story.  No grants in 2008 either.

In 09 Tides US gave Tides Canada no grants, nor did it give any grants to contributors to Robertson listed in this story.

There was $173K in grants to Tides Canada in 08 out of $208M given that yr. (0.08% of giving)  I’m going to go way out a limb and suggest that’s insignificant in terms of Tides US granting that year.

The US Center for Consumer Freedom cited as the sole authority and critic of Tides is also a critic of MADD, PETA, and the Centers for Disease Control.  It was founded by a DC area lobbyist w/money from Philip Morris.  It focuses on making sure that extremist organizations do not infringe on the public ability to do things like smoke in restaurants or eat pharmaceutically treated meat.  Seriously, check these guys out.  Or better yet, read their own site.

 Pew Charitable Trusts was founded with Sun Oil money — in 1948.  It would be reasonable to assume therefore that the founding money for Pew is pre-WWII money, since it takes some time to accumulate significant funds (even in war time) and for those funds to pass to a future generation and eventually through probate to establish a major foundation.

Now on to Hewlett.

 In 2009 Hewlett made a $50K to Tides Canada out of $235M given that yr. (0.02% of giving). [Remember Tides DID NOT make any grant in 2009 to any group listed in article as donor to Robertson.]  Again, I’m going way out a limb here and suggesting that this grant is insignificant to Hewlett based on total giving that year.

At one point the author asks why Hewlett spend so much in Canada rather than in developing countries where the money is so badly needed.  I would suggest that it is because this where the NGO’s are.  Canada has a long and treasured history of establishing charitable organizations that carry their work out internationally.  The author also fails to mention what the charitable focus of the giving from Hewlett to Canada is, or what the charitable focus of Hewlett is worldwide, or the relative global distribution of viable non governmental organziations capable of carrying out the philanthropic goals of Hewlett might be.  All three variable I would assume would play a part in examination of the distribution of Hewlett’s charitable giving.

OK, there were a few errors and mislead statements I had to deal with as well.

Error1:  The author states:

“In 2008, Hewlett granted $US 3 Million to Tides Canada ‘for reducing the environmental impacts of oil and gas development in Northern Canada.’”

In 2008 Hewlett made a $3M grant to Tides US (not Tides Canada).  This is revealed when to click the link provided by the author to the Hewlett website listing grants to Tide US.  It is a direct link to this single grant, so there is no confusion.  The author either purposefully or accidentially misstates this basic fact.

Misleading statement 1  (the very next sentence):

 And in 2009, Hewlett granted a further $US 2 Million.

Well no, actually, since Hewlett didn’t grant the intial $3M, you can’t say they granted a further $2M.  Besides, they granted both to Tides US, not Tides Canada.  Oh, but wait, let me read on:

“However, this was granted through Tides Foundation (USA), not through Tides Canada Foundation.”

OK, so wait, you either intentially or accidentially misstate the giving from Hewlett to Tides Canada in the first sentence, compound it with a misleading statement in the second sentence, and then withdraw some, but not all of your misstatement in the following sentence?  Cool, let me try:

You suck as a writer.  And furthermore you stink.  However, the stink is coming from that cesspool you’re swimming in, not you.

Cool.  That makes what I said OK, right?

OK, some more misleading statements:

“…the Tides Foundation, a deep-pocketed American organization that has received at least $US 140 Million from the Pew Charitable Trusts…”

It would be clearer to add this was over 15 years.  In 2007 it appears from the US Federal Tax returns that Pew posts on their website for anyone to read, that they gave away $159Million.  One can only imagine what the total giving is over 15 years.  I’ll go way out a limb again and suggest that for a foundation as massive at Pew, $140Million over 15 years is insignificant.  That’s scary and crazy, but probably true.

 Oh, and check out this rhetorical trick ( love this one, guilt by association):

“ Hewlett also granted at least $US 7 Million to the Natural Resources Defense Council – which Mayor Gregor Robertson and his Chief of Staff, Michael Magee, visited in April of 2010.”

Did you see what she did there?  Robertson visited a recipient of $7M Hewlett gift.  Citation needed, none given for this particular gift.  One is led to believe by this association, that a) the Natural Resources Defense Council operates outside the interests of Canada in general and Vancouver specifically, and; b) Robertson’s visit was either because he already believes and supports whatever their agenda is (it is never stated), or; c) Robertson was naively tricked by the pod people at the NRDC and now is “one of them” (screeee!).  It never does say when this visit happened, so I’m not sure at what point Robertson was replaced with a pod person.

Also, can I just add something?  I assume Robertson also visits a number of local gas stations.  Should one assume Robertson is also under sway of Petro Canada?

Oh, and by the way, that $7M gift to the NRDC was over seven years.  I think I’m out of limbs to go way out on…

Then there is is kinda long section I’m calling the “red herring” section because it talks about how Hewlett funded a number of initiatives to address the potential hazards of farmed salmon on the ecology of the Pacific Northwest in general and the native salmon stocks in particular.  It’s kind of hard to make people fighting the effects of sea lice look bad, but the author sure tries.  In the end, the section is unrelated and irrelevant to the premise.

Got another error for you.  Error 2:

“And Tides Canada Foundation – of which Solomon is the Vice-Chair, has been paid at least $US 7 Million to “address” Canada’s oil and gas.” (sic)

I went through all the data linked by the author and I only counted $4,820,000 to ”address” oil & gas, not $7M.  This money came from Hewlett (not Pew or Tides US) and the amount was paid over 7 years.  It was also dwarfed by the amount received to assist aboriginal tribes and the amount received related to rainforest management.

Here’s another rhetorical trick for you (I know you love ‘em):

“…Tides Foundation, a deep-pocketed American organization that has received at least $US 140 Million from the Pew Charitable Trusts, another huge American foundation created with funds from U.S. oil interests.”

OK, so we’ve already covered the fact that this Tides Foundation got $140M from Pew.  Over 15 years.  Which is like a drop in the bucket for a huge foundation like Pew. We’ve also covered that the Pew money is old money, like pre-WWII money.  Oil money to be sure, but real old oil money, not the current nasty old BP kind of money, the nasty old “There will be Blood” mind of oil money.

So what’s my beef this time?  Well, when you use the word “another” that word is supposed to refer to the prior thing that you were talking about, anther action, or another actor.  In this case, it refers to another actor — Pew Charitable Truts.  The problem is, the author previously established that Pew was established by oil interests, so the reader (me) defaulted back to the next actor in line, Tides US.  The way this is written is either clever or poor.  I’m going with poor.  This statement, as it pertains to Tides US, is not proven within the article, nor is it necessarily true.

Let’s review:  Donor to Robertson sits on Board of Tides US & Tides Canada. Tides US and Tides Canada made no grants to this donor’s companies or Robertsons campaign during 2008 or 2009.

Premise = Fail.

While there have been gifts from Pew to Tides US, and Pew was founded on Pre-WWII era oil inheritances, these gifts are insignificant compared to overall giving of Pew over the last 15 yrs.  There is no such connection between Pew and Tides Canada.  There is relatively insignificant giving from Tides US to Tides Canada (in terms of total funds given by Tides US).  There are relatively insigificant gifts (in terms of total giving) from Hewlett, founded on computer inheritances (not oil)for oil-based initiatives by Tides Canada over the past 7 years.

There is no conncetion made between Pew funding of Tides US and Tides Canada grants.  There is no connection made between Tides US or Tides Canada and the donors to Robertson’s campaign.  There is no apparent taint on the source of Hewlett funding (computers).  There is no apparent connection between Hewlett funding of Tides Canada oil-related projects and funds going into the Robertson campaign. 

The author entirely FAILS to prove her premise and moreover fails to even conclude with her initial premise, rather, she calls on Tides Canada (not Mr. Robertson) for more transparency in the transmigration of funds from US donors through to Canadian charities.

We can either believe that Mayor Robertson is under the sway of a donor who sits on a foundation that makes grants to other organizations who do work in oil-related environmental areas, or we can believe that Mayor Robertson took one look at the largest oil spill disaster in American history and thought “Shit, I better make sure that doesn’t happen here” and got off his ass to do something about it.

Now, personally I like the third option, which is the “NRDC Pod People” option, but I’m going to go way out on a limb here and suggestion that’s probably not the case.

So read the story yourself and if you like, come back with a saw and start on those limbs I’ve climbed out on.

Seeking The Tao In Chinatown

I have been studying the Tao for more than 15 years (off and on) and I thought it was time I spoke to someone who might know more than what I can gather from books. Since I am living in Vancouver, BC, and since Vancouver has a large Chinese population, and since Taoism originated in China, I thought I might be able to find some guidance here.

It also didn’t hurt that I work close to Chinatown, one of a few concentrations of Chinese businesses, people and potentially temples in the Vancouver area.

Looking up “Taoist Temple” on the internet doesn’t get you very far if you limit it to Vancouver. Unlike the Buddhists, with their fancy Hollywood spokespeople and their pope-like Dalai Lama, Taoism doesn’t have any marquee spokespeople. Therefore, not much visibility.

I did find three apparent temples, one in Richmond, one in Chinatown and one in Japantown (an area just north of Chinatown in Vancouver). So I decided the following day to go in search of the Tao in Chinatown.

The Evergreen Taoist Church of Canada was my objective. Google maps indicated it was located at the foot of Powell Street, just outside the Chinatown train station. Since that is close to my office, I set off, bundled against the unseasonably cool and rainy weather with my fedora and my trenchcoat, looking every inch the foreigner goofball.

You can access Chinatown in Vancouver a number of ways, but all the main ways from downtown into Chinatown are ceremonial in one sense or another. Whether through giant gates, a change in streetsigns from English to Chinese, or a change in elevation, there is a distinct border between the business district and Chinatown.

Entry via the trainstation is one of my favorite ways to go as a pedestrian. You arrive at the top of a steep flight of stairs and descend into Powell Street’s terminus, a roundabout cul-de-sac. Once at the bottom, you are definitely “not in Kansas anymore”. From the aromas coming from the T&T Grocery, to the words overheard on the street and the signs in the windows, you are surrounded by evidence that you are in an enclave.

I love Chinatown. Everything is just enough off kilter to be interesting and just seedy enough to be exciting. My first order of business was to find the temple. It became clear that it was not where the google maps had placed it. I wondered if perhaps it has closed or relocated, a victim of an aging first generation immigrant community or flight to the suburbs of Richmond, where a huge Chinese population now resides.

One of my touchstones in Chinatown is the Sun Yat Sen Gardens. Just outside the gates there is a sort of Chinatown visitor or information centre. In my typical arrogant fashion, I can’t remember what it is and insist on treating it as if it was what I wanted it to be – my information centre.

It was clear when talking to the man behind the counter that I was close, but no cigar, when it came to the temple. In my non-existent Chinese (neither Mandarin nor Cantonese) I tried to explain I was looking for the Taoist temple. My helper frowned and told me no, they were not here anymore, but then after a little more prodding, he indicated that there was a temple of some sort (I was not clear) one block over and one block up.

I walked up to the corner where the venerable Foo’s Ho Ho Chinese restaurant sits and cut down the side street back over to Powell to start my search anew. It’s clear that some gentrification is creeping into Chinatown, with a trendy condo and a really nice little Brasserie now sporting fancy new faces on Powell. But certainly no temple was here.

I pressed on further, reminded that Chinatown is a three story neighborhood. Storefronts at street level are merely the first stage of commerce in Chinatown. Two and three floors above are entirely unrelated businesses, existing side-by-side as they have for years. Scanning the street and three floors on either side of the street while dodging pedestrians, dogs, merchants hawking wares to native speakers (clearly not me), and keeping an eye out for possible threats from the addicted or deranged that drift in from the neighborhood next door worked up a good steam.

Glasses fogging up and nostrils seared with the smell of fish, spices and humanity, I took a pause at the Lee Family Association offices. Dedicated, it seems, to both benevolence for the Lee family and athletics, this sort of family and athletic association is familiar to me from my Irish neighborhood roots. Where I came from these were the sort of places that the old guys hung out in, the young guys went to get hooked up with jobs both on the books and off, and where, if you had paid your dues either on the books or off, you could always turn to for help. Mr. Lee, I knew, was the president of one of the two Taoist Temples and I figured as a last resort I could try my luck here. But not yet.

Working my way back down to the Sun Yat Sen Gardens, I tried my luck at the back door, the heritage centre, figuring they might know the nooks and crannies of the neighborhood better than anyone. The attendant immediatley started in on her rote welcome while I patiently waited for her to take a breath. I then asked if I could get some help finding the temple, which she clearly didn’t have any ideas about. Moreover, she was not entirely comfortable with either her English or my looks, so she quickly retreated to the inner offices for help.

Out came my first break in the form of a 20 something one-and-a-half or second gen girl, wearing neither a nametag nor a hint of hesitation to help. Quickly establishing what I was looking for, she explained that yes, it was on Powell St. but that it was hard to find and I probably had just missed it the first time through.

She was right.

The Evergreen Taoist Church of Canada sits in the 200 block of Powell Street smashed between a book store and a spice merchant. There is a sign in both English and Chinese hidden in the doorway, but like the wisdom the temple holds, it is neither flashy nor immediately apparent to the casual explorer.

A three floor set up, the Temple’s ground floor looks more like an office building housing my childhood orthodontist than a temple. An old elevator stood at one end of the humid entryway, with large hand lettered signs in Chinese above the buttons. Deciding today was perhaps not the day to learn the Chinese words for “Use at your own risk” I decided to take the stairs to the “Ancestors Hall” and the “Main Hall”.

With the not overpowering but everpresent smell of incense infusing my pores, I climbed the three flights up to where I found Sam sitting behind a desk covered in paperwork, minding a small storefront sized, but thoroughly decorated temple. Dripping with sweat, I removed my hat and told Sam what I sought.

With a smile, he told me it was quite impossible. This was no place for lectures or teachers or speeches. This was a place to pray, sing, and make offerings/show respect. Obviously disappointed, I asked what I should do to learn more about the Tao. Sam assumed I had read all I had read in English, to which I replied yes. He asked “Do you speak Cantonese?” to which I replied “No.” He smiled at that and said that all the learning, prayers, and teachings were in Cantonese here at Evergreen, as were all the teachings in the books.

In typical fashion, I quickly said “Fine, I’ll learn Cantonese” to which Sam replied incredulously, “Really, do you have time for that? Don’t you have a job?” He was very kind, let me walk off with some pamplets written in Chinese, and wished me well. I didn’t feel unwelcome, but I was not misled to believe that this was any place for a foreigner interested in dabbling in something simply thought to be exotic.

It wasn’t until I had walked back past the grocers and vendors, the fish mongers, electronics hawkers, hole in the wall eateries, trendy restaurants and condos, the oasis of the gardens and back to the base of the steps up out of Chinatown that I realized that my search had finished as it must. I chuckled to myself as I climbed back up the steps to the wider world of Vancouver and remembered a Taoist saying:

“If you think you can speak about the Tao,
it is clear you don’t know what you’re talking about”

There was no other answer Sam could have given me. You can’t learn the Tao like you learn Cantonese. There is no memorization, no classes to take, no dogma to be drilled. There is only the Tao to be lived and experienced.

You can’t see it because it has no form.
You can’t hear it because it makes no noise.
You can’t touch it because it has no substance.
It cannot be known in these ways,
because it is the all-embracing Oneness.

~ Lao Tzu

All Arise From One

謙遜

These things from ancient times arise from one:
The sky is whole and clear.
The earth is whole and firm.
The spirit is whole and strong.
The valley is whole and full.
The ten thousand things are whole and alive.
Kings and lords are whole, and the country is upright.
All these are in virtue of wholeness.

The clarity of the sky prevents its falling.
The firmness of the earth prevents its splitting.
The strength of the spirit prevents its being used up.
The fullness of the valley prevents its running dry.
The growth of the ten thousand things prevents their dying out.
The leadership of kings and lords prevents the downfall
of the country.

Therefore the humble is the root of the noble.
The low is the foundation of the high.
Princes and lords consider themselves
“orphaned,” “widowed,” and “worthless.”
Do they not depend on being humble?

Too much success is not an advantage.
Do not tinkle like jade
Or clatter like stone chimes

I’m trying to get back to the Tao.

This quote is from Tao Te Ching by LAO TSU
Translation by Gia Fu Feng and Jane English
And found at Daily Tao

Who Will Sing Me A Lullabye?

That’s a video from Kate Rusby, a young UK folk singer, singing about a question that I’m sure lots of people in relationships have, and almost all people who are not in relationships have.  The mark of an artist, in my opinion is one who can take a personal experience and make it universally personal.  I’m not sure I’m being clear, but I’ll pass this time on over-explaining as I am wont to do.

Video courtesy of a blog called The Emperor Has No Toque the blog of a Vancouver area journalist.  What makes it of particular interest to me is the forthright honesty he has in addressing his life with a level of openess I admire and to which I aspire.  I will continue to read and learn.

How To Become A Canadian

How to ID First Editions

.
I love books and collecting them. The thrill of discovery, the gentle madness of the pursuit. I’m not wealthy to have many, but the ones I do have each have their own story. Perhaps some other time.

TO ID a First Edition:
Go buy a copy of A Pocket Guide to the Identification of First Editions by Bill McBride.

What follows is material from that book. Hopefully enough to inspire you to buy it, or at least give you some sense of whether what you hold in your hands is the real deal.

A “First Edition” to a collector is a copy from the first printing of the book – the first run off the press so to speak. There may very well be hundreds of thousands of copies of that first edition if it was a popular book, or very few if it was quite old or a new, untested author.

From the obvious to the convoluted, each publisher generally has a way of indicating that the print you hold is a first edition.

Most obviously, it will have printed on the copyright page the words “FIRST EDITION”.

Since the late 1940s some publishers have adopted a new method of identification. The use a series of letters or numbers that appear on the copyright page. If the letter “a” or the number “1″ appears, what you have is a first edition. Seems simple enough, but not everybody is playing by the same rules.  For exceptions – buy the guide.

So two quick and easy rules:

1.  It Says “FIRST EDITION”

2.  It Says “abcdefghijk…….” or “123456789….”

Often the letters and numbers will run in reverse order:  “987654321″

You need the letter “a” or number “1″ to have a FIRST.

You may occassionally find a number series that ends in “0″ (zero or naught).  That’s a FIRST EDITION if there are no other indicators to contradict on the copyright page.

ONE COMPLICATION:
Sometimes you will find a book that has BOTH the words FIRST EDITION and numbers or letters on the copyright page.  Now you really need the pocket guide.  Depending on the publisher you may or may not have a FIRST despite not having an “a” or “1″ in the series of numbers.  Confusing?  Yes, it is.  That’s what makes it fun!

The older the book or more obscure the publisher, the more exceptions there are to these general rules.

That’s why you should buy the pocket guide.  I throw mine in my bag or actually put it in my pocket when I go book hunting.  Good hunting to you!  Contact me with any questions you might have, I’m happy to help or refer you to a reputable dealer to assist you

Amerika: a notebook in three parts

In September 2009, arcanumproductions.com released a Video-Blog featuring Kat, the main character of “AMERIKA: a notebook in three parts.” The video, in conjunction with an online petition, makes a public please to artist and humanitarian Yoko Ono, asking for her support for the production of the film.

I don’t know if they succeeded but the resulting “Open Letter to Yoko Ono” is a beautiful little film.

The film itself seems a bit odd to me, but if you are interested in more on Arcanum Productions, just click on the name.

One More Favorite Thing

I forgot one of my favorite movies on my list of “Some of My Favorite Things” and ” Some More of My Favorite Things” posts.

The Other Side Of The Bed (Emilio Martinez-Lazaro)
When Paula leaves her mate Pedro, he misses her and looks for comfort with his best friends, Javier and Sonia. Paula is having an affair with Javier. The cuckold Pedro tries to find who is the secret lover of Paula, and hires a private eye. Meanwhile, while comforting Pedro, Sonia has one night stand with him and Javier thinks she is cheating him with her lesbian friend Lucia. (imdb)

Sound silly? Well it is. And lovely, and life-affirming, and fun. And it never fails to cheer me up. And it stars actors I think are really funny (Guillermo Toledo & Ernesto Alterio) and really beautiful (Paz Vega & Natalia Verbeke).

This film owes mostly to the director Emilio Martinez Lazaro, who unfortunately hasn’t done much that’s available in the US, so go seek out this film and rent it!

The Falcon Comes Home To Roost

It all starts out so promising:

The safe return in the face of many spacecraft failures during the 7 year and more than billion mile epic journey is a triumph of human ingenuity. Japanese scientists and engineers are to be congratulated for this magnificent space exploration accomplishment, humanities first round trip to an asteroid. (source)

 

And what is this magnificent accomplishment for humanity?

Japanese space probe, Hayabusa, returned to the Earth on Sunday, ending its seven-year mission to an asteroid, and possibly bringing with it the first asteroid surface samples. (source)

And so it begins. Japan’s Hayabusa (the name means peregrine falcon) just spent seven years chasing down and landing on the billion-year-old asteroid Itokawa.

Hayabusa made two landings on the asteroid’s surface, hopefully gathering the first samples of such an object ever collected from beyond Earth. (source)

The Hayabusa returned only a portion of its equipment to Earth, the first of which was its payload portion, a 16-inch capsule containing the samples from the asteroid Itakawa. The asteroid was named after Hideo “Dr. Rocket” Itakawa, the father of Japanese rocketry. The payload portion landed in a blaze of fire as it re-entered the atmosphere and landed in the Woomera Prohibited Area, Australia’s largest high-security military zone, close to Glendambo, South Australia.

View Larger Map

Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) and NASA teams will recover the payload and return it to JAXA labs in Sagamihara, Japan.  There, they will examine the payload and:

Samples of any asteroidal material captured would be distributed to science teams worldwide for high powered scientific examination. (source)

Sagamihara City Flag

The remainder of the Hayabusa craft disintegrated as part of the re-entry plan. It is presumed that particles of the craft were haremlessly disbursed into the atmosphere. Eyewitness video shows a firey descent and disintegration reminiscent of the tragic destruction of US shuttle Columbia in 2003.

Now would be a good time to keep your eyes open for reports of unusual or unexplained deaths along the route of the “Falcon capsule” or reports of industrial accidents in Sagamihara.  Once the payload is transmitted to scientists around the world, it will be very difficult to track the outbreak, as it will appear to originate in various places.

If you have a Zombie Research Society Chapter near you, now would be a time to be alert to this.

This is how the zombie apocalypse begins.

UPDATE:
Zombie Early Warning Signs
Google News Search: Woomera
Google News Search: Sagamihara

UPDATE 21 June: Falcon arrives in Sagamihara

math = music = funk

If a = b = c, then a = c. So why aren’t kids tested on their funkiness? Bootsy gives us all a reminder that the power of music and art goes hand in hand with the power of math and other scientific pursuits.

Fund the Funk!

Godzilla Attack Emergency Procedures

Procedures in case of Godzilla attack were recently added to our workplace emergency procedures:

Godzilla Attack (Event G) Event G remains a highly unlikely scenario, given recent advances in deep-sea surveillance technology. However, due to our proximity to open water, staff and building insurance policies dictate that additional procedures be provided here.

Potential Issues: Although the size of the Event G threat itself will not allow it to enter the offices, we anticipate issues associated with Event G similar to those posed by an earthquake/tsunami scenario. Precautions have already been taken: windows in outer offices have been sealed, and in offices on the north side of the building, windows have been removed entirely. Additional building structures have been erected against these formerly weaker points, providing enforcement that will shield the offices from the widespread destruction that will inevitably accompany an Event G scenario.

Reports vary, but it is estimated that damage from Event G will be heaviest from sea level to a height of at least 80 meters. Overhead power lines will likely be the first targets as the Event G threat moves from the water into the city centre: authorities anticipate that telephones and electricity will be compromised early on in an Event G scenario. Cellular phones and 3G / 4G internet will be the most viable methods of communication at this point.

First Signs: Notification of Event G will most likely come first via informal sources. Following recent incidents (Event Z), the Communications Manager has been tasked with monitoring potential threats as a normal part of  Risk Management policies. First signs of Event G will likely include a loss of power, shaking buildings, loud, shrill noises, widespread random destruction and, of course, panic. Needless to say, staff should remain calm.

Two-Stage Approach: As an Event G threat is likely to emerge from water, any route out of the city centre may place escapees directly in the path of potential danger. Until the path of the Event G threat can be confirmed, retreat from the downtown peninsula is not recommended. Thus, the emergency procedure for an Event G scenario is comprised of two stages, as outlined below.

Stage 1: Stop, Cover and Hold

• Communcations Manager to monitor appropriate channels, and upon confirmation of Event G scenario, will alert Receptionist.
• Reception to notify staff via phone system with “Event G has been confirmed”.
• All staff to assume earthquake cover: retreat to outer ring offices, away from windows
• MgD to set up communication channels: wireless 3G, laptops.

• Stop, cover and hold until notified to move to Stage 2

Stage 2: Controlled Evacuation
Once the path of the Event G threat has been determined, the authorities will implement a controlled evacuation of the downtown core. Corridors of safe egress will be created and the public will be escorted out following a grid pattern.

• Receptionist to retrieve Earthquake Preparedness Kit
• All staff to exit building in a calm and orderly fashion, as per instructions of military personnel
• Staff that are unable to walk great distances will follow MgD to roof to await alternate evacuation

Staff are reminded to follow instructions of military personnel at all times for their own safety. Comfortable walking shoes and work gloves are highly recommended, as escape routes may include traversing rubble, downed electrical lines and other hazards.

Further Reading:

http://www.japanator.com/survive-the-next-godzilla-attack-with-your-hello-kitty-disaster-kit–8338.phtml

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godzilla

http://www.ehow.com/how_4922224_survive-godzilla-attacks.html

Sun Rips in Two: Hope you enjoyed the internet

One of my hobbies is to adopt a TEOTWAWKI (End Of The World As We Know It) philosophy and just run with it.

My chosen one is that sunspots will take out the electronics all over the world one day, kicking us all back to the pre-industrial age once again.  Hilarity results.

Here is the latest harbinger of DOOM:

“Sun Rips In Two with huge coronal hole – massive solar wind coming”

Your Go To Source for all things Solar should be the SOHO (Solar and Heliospheric Observatory) That is where the image comes from above.

Alien Invasion Emergency Procedures

Workplace emergency procedures in case of alien invasion were recently introduced in my office:

Alien Invasion (Event I)

The chances of a full-scale Event I are slim but still possible. It may not be a question of “if” but rather “when.” There are substantial reports worldwide that a small-scale Event I have already taken place and that activities are still being conducted covertly. These claims have been further supported with videotaped evidence and such documentation has been popping up on all media channels with dire frequency.

Potential Issues:

This appendix will address only the steps staff should take in the event of a full-scale Event I, whereby our planetary security is threatened. It does not include any instructions on what to do in the event that humans are turned into automatons or of hostile organisms taking on the shape and semblance of a human.   In these cases refer to Appendix Z and/or pandemic and/or hostile intruder policies.

Motivations for an Event I to occur may include: destruction, survival, harvesting, enslavement, breeding and/or assimilation.

As major cities are terrorized and entire regions possibly wiped out, paranoia, mayhem and conflict will ensue, resulting in the rapid breakdown of civil society

First Signs:

Visible signs of Event I may include but are not limited to:

• Enormous disc-shaped objects appearing over cities of the world
• Shaking of buildings, rattling of windows and knocking down of poorly secured items on bookshelves and in cabinets. The air may vibrate.
• Possible de-activation of electronic devices and power outages

 

Four-Stage Approach:

As an Event I threat is likely to emerge from air, any route out of the city centre may place escapees directly in the path of potential danger. Until the scope of the Event I threat can be confirmed, retreat from the downtown peninsula is not recommended.

Thus, the emergency procedure for an Event I scenario is comprised of four stages, as outlined below.

. 

Stage 1:  Confirmation and Readiness

Notification of Event I will most likely be picked up first on radio, television and social media channels. The Communications Manager is tasked to confirm for possibility of hoax or rumour. 

If Event I is confirmed and taking place:

• Communications Manager will alert the Receptionist.
• Receptionist will notify all staff via phone system and call for staff to convene immediately in the boardroom.
• Attendance should be taken immediately to ensure that all staff is present

 

If Event I has begun before assembling in the boardroom is possible:

• Seek cover quickly! Event I will most likely be by surprise. Crawl under desks and solid furniture or hide behind concrete walls. Running outside or being out in the open are not recommended.
• Stay as calm as possible. Panicking will not help the situation and will definitely call attention to yourself.
• Above all – do not engage hostiles. Any attempt to negotiate a peace treaty will most likely be faced with extermination.

 

Stage 2:  Take Cover and Wait It Out

Once the first wave of attack has subsided, staff will quickly assemble in the boardroom, where attendance will be taken and casualties assessed. Remaining staff will then make their way to the library on the second floor to bunker down inside the Stockade of Last Absolute Resort. (SOLAR) Instructions on how to seal SOLAR is described in Appendix Z.

All military and armed forces will most likely be engaged in combat. Additionally, there will most likely be a breakdown of security and medical services. The likelihood of the appearance of any emergency personnel is slim to none, so self-sufficiency will be important.

Stage 3:  Evacuation

When the chaos outside has quieted, staff will then exit the SOLAR refuge. As hostiles will most likely concentrate on subduing large cities, it is imperative that staff make their way out to remote areas or areas of seclusion. Living off the land may be a real possibility.

Stage 4:  Prepare for Guerrilla Warfare

Upon leaving the SOLAR safe-room with supplies in tow, staff will open the adjacent storage room on the 2^nd floor and additionally outfit themselves with camouflage tents, camping and survival equipment, combat vests and body armour.

Staff should also access the SOLAR kit described in Appendix Z.  Please note that items in this kit should be used only by staff trained to use them.  Other staff should be assigned items from the Z Kit described in Appendix Z.

It is imperative to save staff members who are technically and mathematically knowledgeable at all cost. These key staff may be able to form an understanding of hostile’s weaponry and/or structural engineering. Understanding and harnessing this technology may allow for counter-attacks.

Unlike the disaster scenarios illustrated in Appendices Z & G, should Event I happen, the anticipated outcome will be catastrophe on a global scale. Although the possibility of being outmatched mentally and technologically is more than real, all efforts must be taken to ensure the survival of the species.

See Also: Zombie Apocalypse Procedures (Appendix Z)</a>

Further reading:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alien_invasion

 http://www.gamespot.com/users/Neo-ganon/show_blog_entry.php?topic_id=m-100-25526733

 http://www.ehow.com/how_2049898_prepare-alien-invasion.html